One of the numerous routines that happy couples vouch for to keep their relationship strong is keeping things hot and heavy regularly. But a troubled sexual life can also be a major factor in a challenging marriage ending.
Without a doubt, sex can be the final straw for marriage, according to psychologist and sex therapist Aline Zoldbrod, PhD, who practices in the Boston region. Nothing else, in my experience, gets at people’s innate feelings of guilt or low self-worth as deeply.
Six men and women discuss the unresolved sexual difficulties that led to the dissolution of their marriages here.
He was unfaithful to me.
My soon-to-be ex-husband cheated on me because our sex urges weren’t compatible. I left when he ultimately declared he didn’t want to be in a monogamous marriage.
We never shared a sexual relationship.
In actuality, the main reason I dissolved our marriage was that, in our one-and-a-half years of marriage, my now ex-husband and I had three separate sexual encounters. I felt that this was the incorrect course of action, and he never really seemed to want to talk to me about any possible remedies (emotional, medicinal, etc.). Someone who makes you feel wanted is the one you should marry.
We never made any novel attempts.
The first person I ever had sex with was my ex-wife, whom I met when I was seventeen. I believe that when we were married, we both felt shackled to each other and unable to explore new aspects of sex. Although there was room for improvement in terms of transparency, having sex never felt particularly enjoyable for us following the miscarriage and birth of our child. We’re so much better together, as co-parents and friends.
Values and beliefs
There will unavoidably be arguments and conflicts in a marriage, but some differences—like fundamental principles and beliefs—are too important to overlook. One spouse can practice one religion while the other does not.
A gulf in values might cause an emotional separation in addition to other typical marital issues.
As you can expect, this might get very problematic when one partner grows weary of attending different places of worship or engaging in other activities separately.
These kinds of marital issues are common in intercultural unions. Core values are among the other distinctions.
These include the upbringing of children and the lessons they learned as young children, such as the meaning of right and wrong.
There is a great deal of opportunity for disagreement and conflict in relationships since people do not all grow up with the same principles, values, and aspirations.
Resolution: Communication and compromise are the only ways to resolve conflicts that result from disparate values. Additionally, the best course of action in situations where compromise is unachievable is to be understanding and accept that disagreements may occur.
Adultery
Infidelity is one of the most common marital problems in couples. According to the most recent data, ten percent of women and almost twenty percent of males who were interviewed admitted to cheating on their partners. It encompasses emotional affairs and cheating.
One-night stands, physical infidelity, interactions over the internet, and both long-term and short-term affairs are examples of further forms of adultery. There are a variety of reasons why infidelity happens in relationships; it’s a prevalent issue that many couples are unable to resolve.
Solution: How can infidelity-related marital issues be resolved?
A partnership that isn’t connecting can end in adultery and a collapse of trust. The three most important strategies to prevent infidelity in a relationship, according to research, are to uphold a close emotional connection, engage in sexual closeness, and respect boundaries.
I paid no attention to her needs.
I was ignorant of the distinctions between the sex experiences of men and women when I got married. I was the stereotypical “short-burst” male, but [my ex-wife] desired a more drawn-out, personal encounter. She asked me to calm down and give her more time, but I was so naïve that I ignored her demands.
He had intercourse with prostitutes.
My former lover offered regular sex, something I have never experienced. He was an incredible lover. However, it turns out it might have been because he had a habit of getting into relationships with prostitutes. After I discovered that, I never had sex with him ever again.
She was overly serious about her sex.
My ex-wife had an unhealthy obsession with sex. It was extremely hard for me not to consider having sex like a job because she had this very specific sex script that I had to follow. She expected me to take the lead, even after she started it. Work was the only thing going on.
